No Am I Smart or am I Dumb?
There are good days and there are bad days.
But if your anything like me, sometimes it’s hard to distinguish what I am…
(Philosophy aside)
I know I am 27 years old.
I know I am getting grey hair.
I know I am 3 years away from being 30 years old.
I know I want to be a business owner
I know I want to have money, and afford nice vacations.
BUT
How do I get there?
This is something I have questioned since my right of passage phase…
And I still don’t have an answer.
Is it luck? Is it hard work? Is it fate / destiny?
I graduated from high school with a 3.8 GPA
I got my Bachelors of Science
I went to grad school
I’ve started 2 businesses
And somehow, I still struggle with knowing if I will ever be “successful” or if I am good enough.
I do not fit the 9am-5pm lifestyle (at least not everyday, like some robot)
Yesterday, my car got towed because I have not paid my registration in 6 months. (going to get my car today, since it was too late to get her out yesterday)
Hence, i’m not the best with finances
But I do have an entrepreneurial spirit!
So I would argue that in the long run, the latter is what matter most!
Besides, money is paper and / or a digit in a computer.
Why are we all so fixated on it?
Why can’t we just print / have the money we need / want like sugar in the stores…
Besides at the end of the day, if you have too much sugar, too often, what happens? Diabetes…
Alas, sugar isn’t controlled in a central bank…
It accessible and unregulated..
But anyways, that’s for another day…
If you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading my rant about my 20 year old life that is currently on a slippery slope.
But besides all this ranting, there are successes I am proud of and keep in the back burner for days when I feel like I am not good enough…
For one, I graduated !
I do my best to help my family
I heal / work on familial generational trauma so I can be the best person I can be to myself and others.
I put in the time and effort to cultivate friendships
I am actively trying to become a better person
I am actively trying new things and discovering where my interests / passions / strengths lie…
All in all, life does not come with a guidebook. It is not easy. Sometimes we will feel like sh*t, like an utter failure, etc. etc. but within those moments, remember that there are good / successful things you have done, there must be! And even if you didn’t graduate or you didn’t get hired at your dream company, at least you tried! and thats what counts! And even if you didn’t try, then still give yourself credit because life isn’t easy and sometimes we don’t do things, perhaps out fear, anxiety, etc. and thats OKAY.
After all, YOU ARE HUMAN, not some robot. Feel your feelings, and forgive yourself for not being “successful” or “winning”. Another opportunity will come, and you will “succeed”.
You are SMART, and you are GOOD enough.
YOU are YOU, and there’s no one out there like you. So continue to be yourself, whatever that is! Cause you’re doing great! And if no one has told you today, I am proud of YOU! 🙂
